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Aphelion

by ROAMS

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1.
Wake up before the crack of dawn You’re telling me to put my jacket on We’re gonna step out into the wind and the cold A place I don’t want to go I can feel it calling my name But I don’t want to be the one to blame I just feel what I feel and I say what I say I won’t say anymore Pick you up at nine, I’ve got your number Happens every time I get down I just think about the times I shared With you Did you wander through the ruins? Asking everyone “What did I do?” Well, I’m choking, I’m broke, and I can’t even tell Where the road is And did they always feel the wind Billowing the sails of God’s big plan? Or did they just go with the flow of it all? I wish I could be the moon Pick you up at ten, I’ve got your number. Stuck up in my head forever, Triple 9, 7 everybody’s sinking sometimes Don’t just grab your coat and go, I think you should stay Happens all the time I’ve got the feeling Everybody’s belly-up sinking to the ceiling Oh! Come back.
2.
You were lost to us On an early summer night It was the last call You made your last fall But there were things above us That you didn’t want to know We saw the light fade Before the lightning came Tell me why you’d listen to Every word they say? Was it love? Or was it shame? Well, do it, I dare you. We won’t be coming back to save you Guess this is the last time You were like starlight taken with the last tide Now they’re all around you And they’re telling you to go. Could you resist this With such an exit? Tell me, did you listen to Every note they played? Did you grin in the moonlight As in rain Well, do it, I dare you. We won’t be coming back to save you. I guess this is the last time You were like starlight, taken with the last tide The last tide Do it, I’m begging you. We won’t be coming back to get you. Kiss it one last time You were like starlight, painted with the last tide Hope I don’t remember you this way Oh no, no, no.
3.
Tell us all your woes I’m terrified of knowing Someone like that again Tear off all your clothes Don’t need them where we’re going Be there later on Hey, do you like it there so far With your new friends and new lovers? I hope you’re having fun But don’t forget me where you are. We’re all your sisters and your brothers After all Mmmm Hey, do you like it there so far With your new friends and new lovers? I hope you’re having fun But don’t forget me where you are. We’re all your sisters and your brothers After all Are we alone? Do you like it there so far With your new friends and new lovers? I hope you’re having I hope you’re having I hope you’re having (fun) But don’t forget me where you are. We’re all your sisters and your brothers After all
4.
Big Sleep 05:42
Just a little conversation You don’t need to be so Uneasy I can feel your hesitation With all your cards in place, You can breathe Get ready for the big sleep The one you always dreamed it would be Believe me Believe me Fire away It hasn’t been my day Big sleep It’s coming to a boil now Soon it will be letting out A scream I hope you’re ready for the big sleep The one you always dreamed it would be Believe me Believe me Fire away It’s just not been my day Big sleep Big sleep
5.
6.
Time 06:32
To be the one. All these people rushing ‘round Just for fun. Taking two steps down At a time To catch the train before It arrives. To be the one. All these people rushing ‘round My head now. Won’t make sense how I was just sinking down To the bottom of my innocence… Suddenly, I see Out of the corner of my eye “35: on time” And I emerge on the street Just in time, in time, in time To see another sign It’s for a sunny sky When you call, I feel a funny little feeling- I don’t want to hear it at all :) I could rewind into Your parents’ living room Oh, we should have done this Some other time… What a lie To be the one I’m taking three steps at a time Just to catch my train on: Time Otherwise, it’s just me And my little feet On the concrete Stamping out in time And I thought I could just call to say You do not have to make your bed today- You will not make it anyway! There is no point in me calling to say “it’s time, it’s time, it’s time, it’s time, it’s time” It’s time to go Tell your younger self you will be well Just wait a couple years until you get Yourself a wetsuit, buy yourself a board on craigslist, Get into the water. Find that you are shitty at this. Put a little effort in, Do a little work on yourself. Get a little stronger, Get into the water And you’ll feel the waves beneath you Feel the ocean moving, feel the Moon is shining above you See what she is doing to you Get into the water Feel a little stronger when you Pull yourself together. Feeling like a number one, you’re Stronger than you ever thought, Ever thought you could be When you were just a little, A little trauma baby. You were hanging on by a thread Now you’re pulling threads behind you While you stand up on your board, and then you Feel your feet below you, and the wave it starts to laugh at you, You’ll start to laugh a little, too. You’ll feel your brain is quiet for the first time in forever. You’re facing death with every left Facing death with every left You’re facing death with every left Facing death with every left You’re Facing death with every left Facing death with every left Paddle a little longer You wanna be there forever. You’ll feel the waves beneath you Feel like you’re connected to her. She says “Are you okay?” The best I’ve ever felt now Go a little longer- The sun is still alight enough There’s time, there’s time There’s time, there’s time There’s time, there’s time (all the time) There’s time, there’s time There’s time, there’s time There’s time, there’s time There’s time, there’s time - There’s time.
7.
Brimming 04:48
Don’t fuck with me Time’s all I need… For now Oh, did you wonder If I had a heart at all? I drove to Montreal Just to shatter Nose-deep in a Heming-way Sweetest blooms of May They fade. While we were brimming, were you grinning through a lie? By the middle of July, You were gone. All at once the tide takes us Away from lands that we used to know Losing air, I hold fast to All of the memories I can’t let go
8.
Aphelion 03:17
Well the sun, the sun is far away from you now. Where’d he go? Way gone, way gone somehow… Pardon me if it’s too soon to celebrate this mess And you’ll freeze, you’ll feel Aphelion. Will he come? Oh sun, come back to us I’ll dream of a wedding some place If that’s the only way to see your face “Some dream, some dream,” they’ll say. Take a leap, take the lead, ‘cause I know you’ve got me And you’re free, you’re free, you’re finally free… Aphelion! There’s a light that’s made from hands of men, and It feels just like a venom, A pale imitation of him By the way, this retrograde is madness And we’re slipping on the sadness Still hoping you’ll come through. Believe me when I say, we’re waiting for you

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released December 12, 2023

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ROAMS Portland, Maine

dreamy lofi lullabies from a spacey lofi wanderer

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